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[ website | The Book of a Million Faces ]
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*le sigh* [29 Dec 2009|03:56am]
[ mood | blah ]

I always say I'm going to keep this updated, but I never do :p Buuut since everything else I do on the internet is blocked on my ship, expect to see more updates probably :p

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bah... [04 Apr 2009|11:08am]
[ mood | gloomy ]

So it's been a sort of hectic kind of couple weeks. Yesterday was pirate day on our ship and I won the costume contest :) Pretty good for only having one night to shop (and only like 2 hours at that) so :p

On a much more serious note, I just found out that a very close friend of mine was killed in a car wreck on Tuesday night. We've been hanging out for years. We had a thing back as teenagers but we never stopped being friends. We've been in trouble together, had some wild times together, you name it, we've done it. He had four kids I believe now. They were nothing short of adorable as are all the Adamson babies. I know he will be missed not only by his friends, but his 3 brothers, a sister and his wonderful mother as well. I knew most of his family and I know they're taking it hard. Please keep him in your prayers.

We'll miss you Lil' Bill

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[15 Feb 2009|11:21pm]
[ mood | mellow ]

So as it is....this is the one time in my life when I actually had a plan and now the Navy screwed it all up. Time for a total life revamp. I'm ready. Bring it, life. :)

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Wow....it's been forever [08 Nov 2008|12:14pm]
[ mood | cold ]

So I'm a horrible LJer or whatever. I never log into this anymore but I want to start again. I see the last time I posted was about this time last year and I was actually happy. Nice. Well John and I aren't together anymore. He dumped me for some girl back home I suppose. Whatever. This Christmas will be one of the only ones I'll have to be alone for. Just me and Austin in a house full of married couples. Lovely. We'll probably shop alot so I don't have to deal. And I miss Sammi. That's about all I've got for now...

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Merry Christmas!!! [25 Dec 2007|01:05pm]
[ mood | cheerful ]

Well, it's already the middle of Christmas here in old J-pan. I'm sad because it's my first Christmas not at home, but John's made it pretty wonderful. We had a little tree with smores ornaments and lookie what he got me :)

hehe it was an impulse buy because what he ordered me hasn't come in yet :( But that means I'll get more Christmas later :)

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[23 Dec 2007|01:30am]
Thanks so much for my vgift dawna :)
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Sooooo I haven't updated in...uh, forever ;) [17 Dec 2007|12:12am]
[ mood | rejuvenated ]

So I thought I'd update....

We're finally back from the long underway. So did anyone else know that if you're out to sea for 56 days consecutively, you're considered a war hero? Geez, it was a long one. Weird thing is that every year for Thanksgiving (for years) our strike group goes to Hong Kong but this year, we got turned away after wading around in the bay for a day and a half. Soooo we went to Singapore and Malaysia. Singapore only for a day, but it was cool. We ate at the only Hooters in Asia. Yes, we went to Singapore and ate at Hooters. (I was with about 6 guys). Hmmmm....what else? Oh, I got my first individual award yesterday. I got a NAM (Navy and Marine Corp Achievement Medal). Nothing too special, but it kinda means something to me. There's a ceremony and the Captain pins it on and stuff. It's kinda cool....

Anywho...as everyone knows, I'm still with John and I love him more every day. He's so good to me. Ok ok ok...nuff of that stuff.

Anywho....Here's some picturesCollapse )

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[08 Jul 2007|04:31pm]
So everyone brace yourselves....I've been in Japan a year today. Now that means a couple things. I got two ribbons today to wear on my uniform. A sea service and an overseas duty ribbon. It also means I only have a year left. Yay!
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[08 Jul 2007|12:26pm]
So I'm not really sure why I'm going to talk about this on here....but I need to vent and really have no one anymore.

In the last almost two years, my perception of myself and my self esteem has gone down drastically. I hate everything about me. I do things I'm not proud of and I think I allow myself to do them because of my super low self esteem. I get involved with guys simply because they pay attention to me. I get all attached and whatnot....I don't know. Hard to describe really. I know these guys don't want relationships, and yet, I still stick around to be treated like shit and left heartbroken. I'm tired of it. I'm tired of guys being like this, but most of all, I'm tired of feeling like this. I've truly came to a point in my life where I know that I have to do something to make me feel better about myself. This underway is the perfect opportunity I suppose. We're going to be gone for a few months. That's a few months of not having to worry about going out, meeting guys, making them happy. I realize that I sound like a 15 year old girl right now, but in my head, it's a lot deeper than that. I'm going down a road of self destruction and I've got to find an exit before there are none.

I know I should probably block this from my sisters or whatever.....but I truly don't care if Mom and Dad knows. I don't want them to, but whatever. I'm a grown up and I'm sure they don't think that I'm perfect....wait, I know they don't. So why try to hide anything from them, when they already think I amount to shit anyways....
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[04 Jul 2007|04:54pm]
Met a guy. Seems nice. Said him and the girl were over with. Saw randomly on myspace where he left a comment for someone that he was gettin married in September. Why is my luck always like this? I guess I'm fucking unlovable.
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[04 Jul 2007|04:16pm]
Just wanted to say happy 4th to everyone!! :)
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[01 Jul 2007|12:12pm]
[ mood | contemplative ]

I just realized that I've never been loved by anyone who didn't have to....

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[15 Jun 2007|01:21pm]
[ mood | owie :( ]

So I just got out of the hospital this morning. It sucked. I look and feel like hell. Apparently I had sediment in my gallbladder that would have formed into gallstones in 3 or 4 days. It caused an infection through my gallbladder all the way through my urinary tract and into my kidneys. My kidney enlarged and hurt like someone stabbing me in my side. Good news is, since they found the sediment before they formed gallstones, they were able to dissolve them. For mommies out there, it was comparable to having contractions in your side, but with no in between. It hurt like the devil and of course, my weird stupid tolerance to narcotics kicked in when they had to pump a dosage of morphine big enough for a 7 foot 300 lb man every five minutes. Yes, every five minutes, for about 9 hours straight. Most people would have enjoyed that but noooooooo, my body wants to be stupid and still hurt with all those drugs. Anywho...I'm gonna go back to bed cuz I want to :(

Someone should come over here with chicken noodle soup and wait on me hand and foot :(

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[03 Jun 2007|08:53pm]
Miss Japan just won Miss Universe 2007. Miss USA got 5th. Weird for some reason.
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[03 Jun 2007|01:24pm]
[ mood | frustrated ]

Oh God....I think I'm falling for him :(

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[02 Jun 2007|08:43am]
Sooooo I guess I should update....wait. Lemme look and see what the last update was ;)

Ahhhh all the way back there....

So went to San Diego for two weeks for a class. Could have been fun. Only thing that kept me sane was my brother's family. Love those guys. Miss him terribly. Anywho, there was a lot of crap go on there that made me glad to leave. I officially got my first person kicked out of the Navy ;) Nah, she did it to herself on my time though.

Anyways...after that went back to Japan for 4 or 5 days and then flew home. It was amazing. I reconnected with some people in my life that I hadn't connected with in a long time. My parents for one. I hung out at home a lot and went out on their boat with them and my sister and her two kids (and my other sister's kid but she wasn't there). Played the rescue swimmer all day. They all loved jumping off the boat, but none of them could swim ;) They'd jump, I'd save and return, repeat. lol...it was fun though.

There are people in your life that, no matter where you go, you know they'll be there and be there for you when you get back or fly through. All those years I hung out with people that didn't give two shits about me, the best damn people I'll ever know were right there under my nose (and right next door!) the whole time. I hung out with Darrell quite a bit. Don't know why really but it was nice for a change. We talked about all the good times and even laughed at some of the bad ones. 7 years is a long time but I don't regret a minute of it. Anywho...

Back in Japan now. :( I'll write more later...I'm tired of typing ;)
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[28 Apr 2007|08:50pm]
[ mood | Tired...of all the shit ]

Have you ever met someone that, regardless of how much you want it, you just know from the beginning that it's not going to work? Shitty part is that it's the first in a long time that you actually wanted it to. Realizing this has made me very bitter and very defensive. I hate the Navy for doing this and I hate myself for being this.

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[27 Apr 2007|09:19pm]
[ mood | pensive ]

So it's been pretty hectic lately. We're going into a yard period on the ship which is crazy in itself. But the inport time is much needed among the crew, even though it is a lot of work. Well, after the month that I'm going to be away for the beginning of it. Let's see....Sunday I fly out to San Diego for a two week class. Fly back to Japan on the 12th. Fly to Tennessee on the 19th and then back to Japan again on the 31st. It's going to be a crazy schedule. Good thing is that I'll be with my brother in Sun Dog for his birthday and home for Austin's. I'm pretty excited. I need to get away from this anyway. This Japan thing is getting old. The navy thing is in all actuality. I have dreams of being a civilian now. It's that bad....I miss all the things I took for granted then. Things as simple as having relationships with people. Not just romantic, but just relationships in general. Everyone says "Oh, you're living the opportunity of a lifetime" but they have no idea what all I've given up. That closeness with people and my own passions. I have nothing here. Only a year left and it can't go by any faster....

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[11 Mar 2007|08:16pm]
So I haven't updated in forever.....so I'm gonna attempt to now. And just in case I ramble and to avoid raping the friend pages, I'll even put it behind a snazzy cut.

Various happenings and rants of lateCollapse )
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[06 Feb 2007|07:23pm]
So we went to Disneyland...in Tokyo. It was cool. I had never been to an American one so it was way different for me. Now I have to go to one ;) lol....It was princess day (a Cinderellabration if you will ;)) so a couple of the good rides were closed down....

Anywho...I'm too tired to talk much about it so I'll just show you some pics :)

Oh...in light of all the celebrations.....I wore a tiara (furry one) and mickey mouse shaped, leopard print earmuffs =)

Now on with the showCollapse )

And there's more....but they're all kinda redundant and boring :) And Ern's hat is glorious :)
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